To tell my psych.

I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose my only friend but i dont want to lose the person in my heart either. I still love him want to be with him after i die. But i don't want to hurt her. I want to make both of them happy. And i know i am not able to be in a relationship with him. Even if we met again i know i am not good with relationships, if we somehow break up i wouldn't be able to go on with my life.
I am fighting hard to live everyday, he is giving me strength but now even thinking of him makes me feel guilty.
I will have to discuss all this with my psychiatrist.