In my last blog I wrote a bit about a letter I got from the employment agency and how their specialist deemed me "fit for any job". I also wrote I filed a complaint because I, as well as my own therapist (as opposed to their therapist) thinks I rather have to sort my stuff out before I end up in any random job again. That complaint was filed end of october and I got a reply from the office earlier this week. I should also note that in the meantime I got a call from them where they urged me to visit them to check possibilities for employment. Let's get it clear that I'm not against working... (I'm repeating myself I guess, but srsly... I'd be all up for a job if it would get me more cash than unemployment benefits)
So anyhow, the conversation with the representative of the agency went a bit weird.
I told her I filed a complaint because their specialist was way off. I'm seeing new therapists because my initial therapist, which I saw during may (the timeframe I saw theirs) figured that there's more "wrong" with me, than just a minor "depression". I think it's safe to say, I'm not depressed because I have a weird deficient somewhere. I think it's simply put because I feel I can't connect to people... and I've tried enough... people on AC are fine, but let's face it, they're somewhat on the same boat. I'll save the entire chronicles on the when and how this realisation of "why can't I connect" for some other time.
So I informed her about the entire deal with my current therapist, tests going on, possible diagnosis and all. To where she, as a re-integration coach, looked a bit weird and told me "well, what does that mean?" I can understand that not everyone is familiar with autism and such, but someone who has a job to help you get back into the workingforce... I'm almost inclined to request a person more knowledgeable than her. But I think I took it nicely and explained her a bit. That's also where I told her I was going mental from the sensory overload at the moment... which is pretty much where the conversation ended because she pretty much figured "if this sound/light is too much, we do have a big problem".
So, back to this week.. agency send me a letter requesting me to retract my complaint. Because they were willing to take me to court over my complaint and have legalities sort it out, but they figured that with me visiting a therapist and possibly soon another specialist, they were going to lose. But hey, I'm a nice guy, so I'm looking if retracting it and putting my signature on some form is just that, or if it's some weird "trap" set up... otherwise I'll just retract. I'm willing to be reasonable, if they want to.
Actually, I could've started the other way around, should've made more sense with the title.. oh well...
My current therapist is making progress with her research on me, which is good. Appparently she'd have my results ready January 18th next year (which is less than a month) and we'd see what else would be up.
Recently I had a session with my mom and my therapist about my childhood and all to see if AD(H)D might be involved here. The hyperactivity part wasn't that prevalent to her, the ADD thing might be. To her it would be pretty reasonable that my ADD kept my ASD in line... hyperfocussing over stimming and such, and quite recently I'm just having too much factors that pull away from my ability to hyperfocus. External factors for a big part, responsibilities, stuff like that. So in a way, it'd be best to just let me have my fun with a big Do not disturb sign on my door to keep me sane. There are meds for ADD she told me, but that would probably kickstart my ASD really, really fast... thus that wouldn't be helping me and probably make me more of a burden for people around me.
A sidenote actually was that my therapist told me that the way I shaped my life so far, at least, the past few years... is, in my situation, one the best ways to keep sane and healthy. Especially taking in consideration my personal interests, preferences and goals. No, that does not make me a contributing member of society of the workforce, but at least I'm not being a direct burden to people.
I still have a more extensive session going on with my mom and the therapist in 2 weeks to see if, and how ASD might have manifested when I was a child. But a lot of stuff already was quite apparent to her. But she just needs enough information (as if those 1000+ questions I had in all her questionaires weren't enough *sigh* )
So anyhow, the conversation with the representative of the agency went a bit weird.
I told her I filed a complaint because their specialist was way off. I'm seeing new therapists because my initial therapist, which I saw during may (the timeframe I saw theirs) figured that there's more "wrong" with me, than just a minor "depression". I think it's safe to say, I'm not depressed because I have a weird deficient somewhere. I think it's simply put because I feel I can't connect to people... and I've tried enough... people on AC are fine, but let's face it, they're somewhat on the same boat. I'll save the entire chronicles on the when and how this realisation of "why can't I connect" for some other time.
So I informed her about the entire deal with my current therapist, tests going on, possible diagnosis and all. To where she, as a re-integration coach, looked a bit weird and told me "well, what does that mean?" I can understand that not everyone is familiar with autism and such, but someone who has a job to help you get back into the workingforce... I'm almost inclined to request a person more knowledgeable than her. But I think I took it nicely and explained her a bit. That's also where I told her I was going mental from the sensory overload at the moment... which is pretty much where the conversation ended because she pretty much figured "if this sound/light is too much, we do have a big problem".
So, back to this week.. agency send me a letter requesting me to retract my complaint. Because they were willing to take me to court over my complaint and have legalities sort it out, but they figured that with me visiting a therapist and possibly soon another specialist, they were going to lose. But hey, I'm a nice guy, so I'm looking if retracting it and putting my signature on some form is just that, or if it's some weird "trap" set up... otherwise I'll just retract. I'm willing to be reasonable, if they want to.
Actually, I could've started the other way around, should've made more sense with the title.. oh well...
My current therapist is making progress with her research on me, which is good. Appparently she'd have my results ready January 18th next year (which is less than a month) and we'd see what else would be up.
Recently I had a session with my mom and my therapist about my childhood and all to see if AD(H)D might be involved here. The hyperactivity part wasn't that prevalent to her, the ADD thing might be. To her it would be pretty reasonable that my ADD kept my ASD in line... hyperfocussing over stimming and such, and quite recently I'm just having too much factors that pull away from my ability to hyperfocus. External factors for a big part, responsibilities, stuff like that. So in a way, it'd be best to just let me have my fun with a big Do not disturb sign on my door to keep me sane. There are meds for ADD she told me, but that would probably kickstart my ASD really, really fast... thus that wouldn't be helping me and probably make me more of a burden for people around me.
A sidenote actually was that my therapist told me that the way I shaped my life so far, at least, the past few years... is, in my situation, one the best ways to keep sane and healthy. Especially taking in consideration my personal interests, preferences and goals. No, that does not make me a contributing member of society of the workforce, but at least I'm not being a direct burden to people.
I still have a more extensive session going on with my mom and the therapist in 2 weeks to see if, and how ASD might have manifested when I was a child. But a lot of stuff already was quite apparent to her. But she just needs enough information (as if those 1000+ questions I had in all her questionaires weren't enough *sigh* )
